Posts Tagged ‘life with a baby’

Before having Brooklyn I always eye-rolled at the statement “It takes a village to raise a child”. The independent, controlling perfectionist in me cringed at the idea of constantly needing to accept, or worse, ask for help.

Somewhere in the weeks after giving birth, post the initial week where my Mom stayed and helped, probably about week 5 when Brooklyn cried for hours each night, the Husband was working long hours, and I was going on like day 3 of not sleeping, showering, or eating much – I gave in. I had my in-laws come and help. They cleaned the whole house, brought me food, and held her while I showered and napped.

I felt like a failure.

It’s ridiculous looking back now. I mean why did I think it was a sign of failure to accept help? I know some people have easy babies and still ask for help. And while I’m not sure I would exactly say Brooklyn was the most difficult baby – dealing with intolerances and reflux (which meant no more than 2 hour blocks of sleep, and hours upon hours of crying) was T-O-U-G-H.

Since that point I have fully accepted and appreciated help when it comes to Brooklyn.

If my Moms want to come up stay for the weekend, clean a little and watch Brooklyn while sending the husband and I out to dinner? Sure!

If my in-laws want to drop off food, pick her up early from daycare, or watch her 1-2 days a week? Absolutely!

If her daycare wants to teach her how to use a sippy cup and spoon? Please do!

So last night, when at 1am we woke-up to Brooklyn projectile vomiting all over our bed and us – it was nice to know that we would could count on help over the next few days.

Meaning, even though our washer has been broken since Tuesday – my in-laws have kindly offered to do loads for us while we wait on a repairman. Which after hour 4 of random projectile vomiting, and our fourth change of sheets – it was so helpful to know that we would have help getting clean sheets today, given everything was covered in puke.

And even though the Husband had to get to work, and I really need to log on and work for a while, and her daycare won’t take her if she is puking, my amazing MIL came over, brought some baked apple and sweet potato, and offered to watch her for a few hours so I could get some work done, shower and get ready to host her (small) birthday party tomorrow (umm she turns ONE on Sunday?!).

It’s a comforting feeling to know we have this amazing support system so readily available for us. And when that nagging “you need to do it all and stop asking for help feeling comes up these days”, I remind myself, it’s even more valuable that Brooklyn gets to be surrounded by and cared for by so many family members and adults who want to care for her.

And so I’m a-OK, and downright thankful, that I have this amazing village to help raise my child.


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