Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Posts Tagged ‘Triathlon’

I had a long conversation with my Mom on Tuesday. It’s funny actually, in the past few years, especially since getting married I tend to go to the Husband for almost everything but, there are still times when I need my Mom. She asked exactly what everyone else has been asking. Well, in her therapist like Mom way.

Why are you doing the half-ironman?
For a number of reasons I said, first for fun, second for fitness and third it’s something I’ve always had in the back of my mind to do in my lifetime.

Well, are you having fun?
The answer was no. For a few months now, it’s obviously clear I’ve been struggling. Workouts that should be fun became a chore. Training somehow always became lowest priority. Anxiety and stress was always looming. I found myself so moody and negative when thinking of the months ahead. The whole point was to enjoy the next few months as much as possible before trying to expand our family, and I feel like we’re now in the opposite place. I’m wishing away the time.

Are you getting fit?
Yes, although I’m not losing weight because I’m stress eating. I keep wanting to try to change around my diet but keep fearing of messing with my training. But endurance and strength wise, I’m doing really well. I would regret stopping training in all ways or not doing something with my training.

Is this the only time in your life you think you can do a half-ironman?
No, it’s not. I hope it’s not at least. I have future fitness goals of all sorts.. a half ironman… a marathon…short races post baby like 5ks and 10ks. I want to do it all for the rest of my life.

And so the answer became a bit more clear. I’m not doing the half-ironman this year.

I am signed up and doing a triathlon at the end of June in its place, when my Mom will actually be home from Alaska and plans to come watch. A race that is 4 miles from my in-laws meaning everyone can come watch, and then we can all go to a celebratory breakfast after.

I don’t know if I’ll regret this decision. I just know that right now, I don’t. I feel relief. I feel happiness. I feel like a weight has been lifted off of me. Something in my gut kept saying now isn’t the time – some fear, not even about physically finishing but more so the risks involved – and it wouldn’t go away. And so now, I feel pretty pumped about competing in a regular triathlon. One that with my recent training, I’m actually excited to crush in comparison to any tri I’ve done before.

The hardest part, or so I thought would be, was telling everyone. Each conversation I felt like a failure when I started to explain that I’ve dropped out this year. Yet each time, friends and family were unbelievably understanding and all reminded me of the same thing – if I’m doing it for fun, and it’s not fun, it’s defeating the purpose. It’s been sort of  a “duh” moment really.

This Saturday I’m going on an early morning ride with two girlfriends. Then this Sunday I have my duathlon. Then a few weeks of training, training that I’m actually really excited to do, and training that won’t be taking over my life, before crushing this June triathlon. In the meantime, I want to just enjoy the next few months. I want to go St. Thomas with all the women in my family in May and lay on the beach, eat, drink, and get a few workouts in – relaxing in the best possible way. I want to eat healthier. I want to spend time with the Husband and friends. I want to make plans at last-minute, I want to sleep in, I want to have a glass of wine or two without feeling guilty. There’s a real possibility we want to start trying to expand our family this summer, and more than ever, I need to be honest with myself about how I want to spend my time.

So here’s to the next few months – enjoying life and being true to myself.

Read Full Post »

B called me this past Friday night.

As I was setting out my gear and clothing for each section of my tri I saw his name pop up on my phone. I almost didn’t pick it up, but it’s random when he does call so I thought maybe there was something wrong.

Turns out he was driving down to the Cape and wanted my advice on whether or not to buy a piece of Real Estate. I couldn’t talk long since my wake up time was going to be 4:40am but he did a quick overview of what was going on and I rationally tried to talk him through some of it.

We agreed it would make more sense to talk at a later time and hung up.

I really enjoy being B’s friend. Not in a, “let’s hang out and talk intimately about life together” sort of way but more in an “if anything is wrong, or you need to chat, here is someone who knows you so well” and it’s OK to call them.

But I no longer want to tell him certain details about my life, I want those saved for just the Townie.

I haven’t posted too much detail about the Townie. Part of it is in fear that by saying it somehow it will change things. Part of it is that this blog was founded on my breakup with B, going through heartbreak, and the ups and downs of dating. But that’s all changed and I guess my blog has really changed with it.

The truth is, I love the Townie, more than I ever expected to. I mean did I really think I would meet someone on Match.com? No! But, I’m just so excited for our future – the prospect of travelling together, living together and being married. I can picture him being such a great Dad. The way he looks at me, like I’m just this amazing girl he can’t help but love is the best feeling in the world. Every day I feel like I love him more and more and I just didn’t know that was possible.

I don’t really know if there was a point to this post except to reflect on how things really do change.  Without sounding too preachy, you just can’t picture what your life will be like in a year from now.

The most important thing I have learned from the last year is that you really have to take a few risks, be uncomfortable, and get out there to make changes in your life. I wouldn’t have done my first Tri, or gone gallivanting through South America with a new friend, or tried online dating otherwise. And most importantly, I probably wouldn’t be over B.

Yet now I’m hooked on tris and fitness, I’m planning yearly trips with that new friend who has become a great friend, and I’m in love with a guy who’s perfect for me.

It doesn’t mean all of your efforts to change will always turn out successful. I have countless posts on feeling lonely, frustrated, anxious and heart-broken. But eventually that changes too. All of that, was well worth the results.

“Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”

Read Full Post »

So I did it.

I completed my second triathlon. (You may recall my first triathlon last summer.)

The second triathlon wasn’t that bad physically.

Mentally…it was really hard.

Let’s start from the beginning:

Saturday at 4:30AM: The townie texts me to say good luck. Have I mentioned he is a police officer? He was on the overnight shift and clearly awake. My alarm had not gone off yet at this point. Sweet but I wanted to kill him 🙂

4:40AM: Alarm goes off. First thought that popped into my mind? Whyyyyy am I doing this? It’s pitch black and I could be peacefully sleeping not shaking from anxiety.

5:00AM: Get into car with friend to drive to state park.

5:15AM: Get an awesome spot with minimal walking to the transition area. 3 stops at the porter pottys needed by this point. (TMI, but it’s the truth!)

5:30AM: Shovel in peanut butter on a slice of bread and one banana. Hydrate with water diluted powerade.

5:45AM: Walk towards transition areas with bikes/gear. On the way in get body marked by 14-year-old boys. Pretty awkward to strip in front of them but oh well. One boy told me “you have a strong bike ma’am, you’ll be great!”  Hmm, thanks?

6:10AM: Transition area is all set up, bike is on the rail, ready to kill some time before heading towards the water. The bike setup is a little different because rather than just one long rail that has for example bib numbers 400-460, it actually has stickers with your exact bib number on your spot. Porter Potty trip times 94859485.

6:25AM: Head back into transition to drop keys & flip-flops. Notice my bike has been switched.

I used to set my bike up so that the handlebars were on the railing but lately it’s made me nervous that it messes with my gears. So I decided to put my seat on the railing like the picture below.

source

Apparently I originally set this up incorrectly. I had 90% of my bike not on my sticker side (so the handlebars and the front tire were on the opposite side, facing away from my sticker). When I came back into the transition area the officials actually flip-flopped my bike so that now it was still on the rail by the seat however the front wheel and handle bars were on my sticker side facing me.

This actually threw me off a little because I hadn’t set it up like that before. I learned something new!

6:45AM: Transition is closed, everyone heads down to the lake beach for the national anthem and such. 1400+ of us smushing together on the beach.

7:00AM: The first swim waves are starting. My age group (of 172 people!!!) wouldn’t be getting into the water until 7:25AM.

7:10AM: Repeating in my head that I’m here to have fun and get fit, it doesn’t have to be about winning. It’s at my own pace!

7:18AM: My heart rate is through the roof as I wait for the countdown for us to get into the water.

7:20AM: 172 women wadding deeper into the lake to start the swim. The distance looks a lot longer at this point.

7:22AM: Trying to swim but my heart rate is so high that every time I put my face into the water I feel like I’m out of breath and panting.

7:23AM: Pep talk with myself. Go slow and relax.

7:24AM: Slow breast-stroke with minimal face in the water time. This clearly slows me down but it keeps me moving. Every 30 seconds I flop onto my back for about 5 seconds to calm down.

7:34AM: Out of the water. (I only knew this time after as it ended up taking me 14 minutes to do the 1/3rd mile swim.) Run along the beach up to the transition area. See that there are wetsuit strippers which I’ve never seen before. I was told to lay on my butt and it one quick pull the guy had my full body wetsuit off. I screamed YOU ROCK and jogged to my bike.

7:37AM: Changed and running my bike out of the transition area. With a mix of others getting onto our bikes.

7:38AM: Turn right out of the park on the bike, celebrating the end of the swim and then I see the first part of the bike course. A big long gradual hill.

8:00AM: Moving steady on the bike and having fun. This isn’t so bad.

8:02AM: Heading straight down an even side road when I see what looks like two bikers on the ground. Ambulance noises are coming at this point. As I get closer I see him. More blood than I have ever seen before pouring from a guy’s head and side. Everyone is told to keep moving.

8:05AM: Crying. I’m going to be honest here, I cried for the at least the next 5 miles of the bike ride. I’ve never seen someone hurt like that in real life. I’ve never thought about how dangerous triathlons can be and really how mortal we all are. From the amount of blood and his eyes being closed, I assumed the worst. I slowed my bike pace down quite a bit at this point because it just made me realize that nothing is worth getting that hurt.

8:40AM: Bike is over. 15 miles DONE and I did it without getting hurt. I hopped off my bike at the dismounting line and was very disoriented by how wobbly my legs felt. This is why I should have trained with brick sessions like last year. 

8:42AM: Choked down a Clif shot blok and jogged out of the transition area. I’m not physically that tired at this point, but I have to pee (why does this always happen to me?) and I can’t stop thinking about the man who fell.

8:55AM: I’m walking parts of the run. I don’t know why, I know I could push myself but my legs feel like 2,000lbs. Turns out I was jog/walking 11:40/mi at this point.

9:05ishAM: Realize this is ridiculous, it’s time to at least jog. Jog and sprint the last 1.5 miles into the finish. I sprinted so hard at the very end that a guy actually yelled “Awesome finish!!!” 8:56/mi average for that last 1.5miles! 🙂

9:25AM: It’s over. I did it. I don’t feel that tired or sore, I’m just happy and taking pictures with my friend and her family and thinking about how much I want ice cream.

And that was my day. I’ll have to write part 2 about the rest of the day, and then watching the half-ironman on Sunday. Crazy people those half-ironmen and women are.

I also haven’t been able to find anything about the guy who got hurt so I hope that means he is OK now.  I’m so grateful to have finished and finished safely.

I’ve got another Tri coming up in September. This one is shorter distances and all women. I know exactly how I need to train over the next month. 🙂

Read Full Post »

I could be in a bad mood today.

I skipped the gym last night because my legs were so sore from Monday night’s strength training and run.

Then I was wide awake playing words with friends until 12:30am.

Then I had a dream I put my wetsuit on, got into a lake, and couldn’t stop sinking because I ate too much and it was pulling me down.

I shut my alarm off when it went off at 6am so I could sleep more.

But you know what? There are a lot of things to be happy about today.

F*** the negativity.

For one, I’m hitting the gym during my lunch hour. Mental health lunch has never been more needed. And it’ll be an even better workout since I got that extra hour of sleep this morning.

And, did I mention I now have an iPad? YES. I loooove it. Basically my mother (who is clearly far cooler than me) had one from work but it’s an older version so they gave her a new version and said she could keep the older version. Old version is still new version for me! 🙂

Do you know what I’m doing at 5:45pm today? Finally using one (of two!) of my groupons for an hour-long massage at a place right by work. It’s the perfect timing (currently sore and I have my tri this weekend) and I’ve only read amazing reviews about the place.

Then I’m meeting up with the Townie to have dinner at a new burger place I’ve been dying to try. Red meat = iron = strong muscles for my tri, right?

And on a super exciting looking forward to it note – my 3 boston girlfriends and I just booked a wine vineyard weekend trip with our 3 non-boston friends this fall. Woohooo!

Read Full Post »

When I first moved to Boston after college I craved chaos.

Basically, I wanted to continue with my college social life. I worked a job I hated from 9am to 7pm and then ordered takeout or went out to eat every night and frequented the bars as often as possible. I stayed over at friend’s places for an entire weekend – eating, drinking and socializing every free second of time. I did my laundry maybe once in the time of 3 months and cleaning absolutely never happened. And the gym? Not a chance.

That all toned down a bit when I got a different job and started getting my masters at night. However, it was still chaos, just controlled chaos. I’d go to work from 9am-5:30pm, run to class from 6pm-9pm, then see my boyfriend, friends or run after. Most mornings I found myself getting up hours early to attempt to write a paper or read assigned texts for a class that night. Weekends were packed with friends or travel.

And this summer has really topped the chaos meter. Don’t get me wrong, this summer has been fantastic:

  • 2 Cape Cod trips with the Townie (one with his friends)
  • 1 trip to Florida with family
  • 1 trip to NY for my sister’s graduation from college
  • Warrior Dashing through mud (resulting in poison ivy) and gallivanting around phantom gourmet’s bbq beach party
  • A night in Rhode Island for dinner with family & the Townie
  • A moving away party for a friend
  • A weekend visit from 3 NY besties packed with a duck tour and red sox game
  • A week-long training at work
  • A week-long beach vacation with a few of the girls
  • A Portsmouth weekend trip with the Townie
  • A going away party for another friend
  • A birthday bbq in the suburbs

And that’s not including tri training, dinners after work with friends, or the upcoming weeks with 2 weddings, 2 tris, a 10k, a Patriots game, 2 kayaking trips, 2 fantasy football leagues & drafts, and a weekend in Stowe, Vermont with zip lining. That’s just the end of August through September.

Whoa.

As the summer is coming to an end and my crazy Fall is starting I am realizing all I want these days is some simplicity and routine.

I’m craving getting up in the morning and going to a spin class, going to work, coming home to a clean apartment, cooking a fabulous home cooked dinner and sitting down with the Townie to enjoy it.

I’m craving a weekend morning where I can wake up and not have a packed schedule for the day. Instead just decide what I want to do that day.

I’m craving living off of one cup of coffee on most days and not 4 in order to keep my eyes open.

I’m craving exercise for fun, and not for tri or road race training.

I’m craving quality time with my friends, but not having to make plans multiple nights per week, squeezing it all in.

I feel like I’m ready to leave behind the chaos and even some of the controlled chaos for a while.

I’m ready to build a life with the Townie, which means fantasizing about moving in together when my lease runs up next Spring. And yes that fantasy includes a pave setting princess cut diamond ring hanging out on my finger. 🙂

I feel like I’m ready to have more space than my studio apt (umm, like a bedroom!) but also so I can cook dinners and invite people over and skip the crowded bars where I have to scream at my friend to find out how her new job is going only to ask “what” 4 times before hearing her answer.

Maybe that makes me old, or boring, or anti-social, but it’s a change I’m going with. This fall and winter I’m toning it all down. Maybe simplicity isn’t such a bad thing. 🙂

*source

Read Full Post »

At the end of last summer I completed my first triathlon. I’ve said it so many times before – it was such an amazing, positive, and incredible accomplishment. I felt on top of the world.

Now I have a triathlon in 5 days. I haven’t been training like I did for almost 15 weeks last year. Instead I’ve been eating, and drinking, and enjoying myself…maybe a little too much. Don’t get me wrong, this has been an amazing summer and I’ve loved it. But I wish I had gotten my butt in gear earlier.

So maybe I’ve been swimming less than 10 times in the past few months. And I’ve totalled 6 spin classes. And I can’t seem to run a 5k. I do these tris for fun and for fitness. I might be the last person crossing that finish line, but I will cross it, with a big friggan smile on my face.

Read Full Post »

This past weekend was a fun one, but in some ways it was a roller coaster of emotions.

Early in the week the Townie and I bought movie tickets online to see Friday’s showing of Bad Teacher.  Once we got to the theater we found out that Harry Potter had taken over all of the theaters and our movie had been cancelled. We ended up getting a refund AND a pair of free tickets to see a movie any time we want. Score.

Since the movie was cancelled the Townie and I headed to Target. I’m sponsoring a 5-year-old little girl going into Kindergarten so I needed to pick up a backpack, lunch bag, folders, crayons, etc. My favorite part of school was always the back-to-school shopping so it was really fun. Even though it was a mundane, silly little Friday night – the Townie and I both agreed we had so much fun together.

Saturday morning we headed to a diner for breakfast and then I asked if he would be interested in taking a walk through my area so I could take pictures with my Canon Rebel that has been sitting in its box for months.

The Townie then headed home to an engagement party and I attempted a quick run (a painful 2 miler) before I headed to my friend’s goodbye party. (She’s moving to Canada 😦 )

After a few hours there, I rushed home, showered and got ready for the Townie to pick me up. His sister had her bridal shower earlier that day and wanted us to stop by for a drink and the whole crowd from the engagement party he attended was planning on going out in Boston so we were meeting up with them.

We had a quick drink at his sister’s where she had about 25 people over. It’s been nice getting to know his sister since with B, I was so close to his sister. After we went to meet up with his friends. While I like the Townie’s friends a few of their girlfriends/fiances/wives aren’t exactly the nicest girls. The Townie is my age (26) so the significant others of his friends are all around my age but they seem pretty immature. But a few of them are miserable. I give people the benefit of the doubt, and I’ll be nothing but nice, but they can be really catty, mean, insecure and the opposite of welcoming with a new person in “the group”.

I’m trying my hardest not to let those girls get to me, but I haven’t dealt with “mean girls” in a long time. I just don’t have the patience for it. The rest of the night was fun, mostly because I was dancing around with the Townie (I danced he swayed) before we headed home where I devoured two slices of pizza that were bigger than my head.

Sunday morning I woke up feeling hung over. Too much sun, too much sugar, and way too much prosecco and vodka was not a good combination. I stayed in bed until 12:30pm when I had to go meet my friend S to swim for the first time in months.

As painful and uncomfortable as I felt, the swim somehow made me feel a bit better. Maybe the chlorine soaked up the alcohol. 😉 After a good amount of laps, we got on spin bikes for about 15 minutes before I spent a good 20 minutes stretching.

I got home in the afternoon with lots of plans to clean and organize my life. The hangover won. I napped on and off for a few hours, watched tv, and was back into bed early. I decided this morning that at least until training, I need to take a bit of a break from drinking. A glass of wine here and there is fine, but nights like Saturday night really left me useless yesterday. It also seems to mess with my mood a bit making me sensitive, depressed and lazy.

Today though, is the start to a good week. 🙂

*all of these photos were taken by me 🙂

Read Full Post »

Older Posts »